MHAM Playlist|Music & Mental Health Vol. 9 [Final]

Hello my BAYOG luvlies~ Yes… I know… Again, I know that May is over and so is Mental Health Awareness Month. I know… it’s also halfway into June already… I was clearly awful with time management and planning… However, mental health is an important topic to learn and show concern about no matter what or when. So I’ll be ending our MHAM Playlist post series with the final post today~ I feel like often times we, myself included, do alot to show that we love those we care about. However, we tend to forget to or have a hard time loving ourselves. So this final MHAM Playlist post is centered around the struggles and realization to love oneself. We may view ourselves a certain way, but we often don’t realize our own positive qualities and how we affect others. I also just wanted to once again remind you all, that you are not alone.

You can find the previous volumes of the MHAM Playlist, here:

• [Volume 1] BTS – Blue & Grey || BTS – 00:00 (Zero O’Clock)
• [Volume 2] NIve – Tired || DAY6 – 그렇더라고요 (When You Love Someone)
• [Volume 3] DAY6 – Zombie || Lee Hi – 한숨 (BREATHE)
• [Volume 4] B.I | 깊은 밤의 위로 (Midnight Blue) || YAYYOUNG | You’re A Mess I’m A Mess (And That’s Alright)
• [Volume 5] BIGBANG – Loser || Taeyeon – 내게 들려주고 싶은 말 (Dear Me)
• [Volume 6] Crush – Digital Lover || DAY6 – All Alone(혼자야)
  SeungYoon – 멍 (BRUISE) || LUNA – 운다고 (Even So)
• [Volume 7] Jonghyun – 하루의 끝 (End of a Day) || D.O. (EXO) – 괜찮아도 괜찮아 (That’s Okay)
  NIve – new light || Crush – Lay Your Head On Me
• [Volume 8] ONE OK ROCK – Broken Heart of Gold || DAY6 – I Need Somebody (누군가 필요해)
  Agust D – So Far Away (Feat. Suran) || BTS – ON || Gaho – 시작(Start) || YUQI– Giant
• [APAHM Edition] keshi – skeletons || Jennifer Chung – Take It One Day At A Time || Jennifer Chung – If Only ||
  Jhameel – Waves || David Choi– Hold On || Clara C – Brighter Days

You can find the Airbag Playlist on Spotify, here:

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MHAM PLAYLIST| VOLUME 9

For our final post in this series, I’ve included: “Reflection (RM’s Solo)” by BTS, “유통기한 (Expired)” by Tablo of Epik High, “Epiphany (Jin’s Solo)” by BTS, “Answer: Love Myself” by BTS, “Celebrity” by IU, “Do You Feel Like You Have No One to Turn To?” by YAYYOUNG, “Love Poem” by IU, and “We’ll Be Fine” by ReN. One of the major things I wanted to talk about today was the idea of loving yourself. Again, we often tend to show alot of love towards others. However, when it comes to ourselves… we can be quite hard on yourselves. Sometimes we feel like we’re not worthy of love. It can be difficult to love ourselves. After all, we’re stuck with our thoughts. When you hear and believe things hard enough, you tend to believe them to be fact. I am one of those people who really struggled with loving myself. Whether it was my appearance, my dreams, my achievements, or personality… I found some faults or believed the faults others would constantly criticize. People probably don’t realize that I’m someone with alot of low self-esteem.I had a tendency to hate myself, think I was useless, and worthless. It’s something I’ve talked about time and time again before. I know y’all probably also think I put alot of BTS songs here, but I have a reason. BTS, their music, and their messages in their music truly gave me an epiphany back in 2017. The epiphany of having to love myself, because true love starts by loving yourself. It’s a message that they’ve [constantly been promoting]. Honestly, their Wings, You Never Walk Alone, and Love Yourself albums really helped me realize that and grow. The past couple years had always been hard for me, but 2017 was particularly hard. Those albums really did help me. So I’ve been doing my best to try to learn to love myself bit by bit. I admit that although I still struggle with alot of things, I am in a much better and happier place than I was back in 2017. I’m still on this journey of loving myself and seeing the worth and beauty of the different parts that make me who I am. Things are difficult, but we can try to overcome things bit by bit. You don’t need to love yourself right away, but gradually try to learn to love yourself, bit by bit. It’s not easy, but I hope we’re able to overcome our insecurities and gradually learn to love ourselves.

“I wish I could love myself…”

BTS | Reflection (RM’s Solo) | Translation by [Genius]

“I’m afraid I’ll be a book that no one reads…
Music that no one listens to anymore…
I’m afraid I’ll be abandoned like a movie playing in an empty theater…”

Tablo (Epik High) | 유통기한 (Expired/Expiration Date) | Translation by [Genius]

“I’m the one I should love in this world…
Shining me, precious soul of mine…
I finally realized so I love me…”

BTS | Epiphany (Jin’s Solo) | Translation by [Genius]

“Loving myself might be harder…
Than loving someone else…”

BTS | Answer: Love Myself | Translation by [Genius]

“The me of yesterday, the me of today, the me of tomorrow…
(I’m learning how to love myself)
With no exceptions, it’s all me…”

BTS | Answer: Love Myself | Translation by [Genius]

“Can’t you see how beautiful
A true uniqueness can be?
You’re my celebrity“

IU | Celebrity | Translation by [Genius]

“Oh how brave you are
You just close your eyes
Let the stars fall down“

YAYYOUNG | Do You Feel Like You Have No One to Turn To?

“On the day when your long night ends
I will be there
Where you raise your head and look…“

IU | Love Poem | Translation by [Genius]

“We’re all in this together
Don’t you worry
It’ll be okay
Those simple words came to brighten my day“

ReN | We’ll Be Fine (English Version)

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BTS | Reflection (RM’s Solo)

Truthfully, I didn’t care about the song all too much on my initial listen. However, I really started to feel it when I looked at the lyrics. I looked it up because the part that went, “I wish I could love myself” really struck me. Seeing the translated lyrics, I really connected with it. The track has a somewhat dreamy feel to it, which fits the reflection theme. It’s a weird thing when you know that everyone is different, and has their own circumstances. Things can be interesting, things can be boring. Yet, there are times you still can’t help but hate yourself and your situation. I honestly remember feeling alot of mixed emotions and I’d also often take walks to look at my surroundings, and just reflect on my thoughts and emotions. I spent a long time kind of just covering my unhappiness with a happy kind of mask. At that time I was so overwhelmed by everything, and I was really being eaten up alive by my own self-loathing. Yet, I did want to love myself back then. However, now… the weight of everything from back then is alot lighter. I still have alot of thoughts on my mind, but I feel more at ease than I did then.

[Verse 1]
I know
Every life’s a movie
We got different stars and stories
We got different nights and mornings
Our scenarios ain’t just boring
I find this movie very amusing
Everyday, I want to shoot it well
I want to caress myself
I want to caress myself
But you know, sometimes
I really really hate myself
To be honest, quite often
I really hate myself
When I really hate myself, I go to Dduksum
I just stand there with the familiar darkness
With the people that are smiling
And beer, which makes me smile
Coming to me softly
Fear, which holds my hand
It’s okay because everyone is in twos or threes
It’s good that I have a friend, too

[Chorus]

[Verse 2]
The world is just another name for despair
My height is just another diameter for the earth
I am all of my joy and anxiety
It repeats everyday, the love and hate directed to me
Hey you, who’s looking over the Han River
If we bump into each other while passing, would it be fate?
Or maybe we bumped into each other in our past life
Maybe we bumped into each other countless times
In the darkness
People look happier than the day
Everyone else knows where they’re supposed to be
But only I walk without purpose
But still, blending in with them is more comfortable
Dduksum, which has swallowed up the night
Hands me an entirely different world
I want to be free
I want to be free from freedom
Because right now I’m happy but I’m unhappy
I’m looking at myself
At Dduksum
[Chorus]

[Outro]
I wish I could love myself
I wish I could love myself
I wish I could love myself
I wish I could love myself
I wish I could love myself
I wish I could love myself
I wish I could love myself
I wish I could love myself

BTS | Reflection (RM’s Solo) | Translation by [Genius]

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Tablo (Epik High) | 유통기한 (Expired/Expiration Date)

You all know how much I love Epik High and Tablo. Their music and lyrics are amazing. However, it’s special to me because it so accurate describes various thoughts and emotions I’ve been through. Tablo’s “유통기한 (Expired)” was one that so eerily described such thoughts and emotions when I was at rock bottom. It’s a song that describes the fear of feeling that your life has no meaning, that it leaves no impact, and that you will be simply forgotten. It’s a sad fear to think, “This whole time that I’ve been living…will I just disappear without a trace or meaning?”

[Verse 1]
Even if I look at the clock
I don’t have time, goodbye now

[Verse 2]
Even if I look at the calendar
I don’t have any memories now

[Chorus]
I’m afraid I’ll be a book that no one reads
Music that no one listens to anymore
I’m afraid I’ll be abandoned like a movie playing in an empty theater

[Verse 3]
Even if I look at the phone
I don’t have any relationships now
Even if I look into the mirror
In there, there’s no confidence now

[Outro]x2
I’m afraid I’ll be a book that no one reads
Music that no one listens to anymore
I’m afraid I’ll be abandoned like a movie playing in an empty theater

Tablo (Epik High) | 유통기한 (Expired/Expiration Date) | Translation by [Genius]

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BTS | Epiphany (Jin’s Solo)

This song is one of the songs that hit hard for me. Any BTS ARMY knows that Jin struggled with seeing his self-esteem and self-worth. He thought he wasn’t talented and was the weak link. But that’s not true, he makes a part of a team that’s been able to achieve so much despite the doubt and criticism from others. And that’s honestly really relatable. This track showed his epiphany. That is to accept and love yourself. You are precious. Adoration from others is great and all. However, you should be true to yourself and see your own worth. If you are to love someone, remember to love yourself.

[Verse 1]
So weird, I for sure loved you so much
Adapted to you with everything, I wanted to live my life for you
But as I keep doing that I just can’t bear the storm inside my heart
The real myself inside the smiling mask, I reveal it entirely

[Chorus]
I’m the one I should love in this world
Shining me, precious soul of mine
I finally realized so I love me
Not so perfect but so beautiful
I’m the one I should love

[Verse 2]
I’m shaking and afraid but I keep going forward
I’m meeting the real you, hidden in the storm
Why did I want to hide my precious self like this?
What was I so afraid of?
Why did I hide my true self?

[Chorus]
I’m the one I should love in this world
Shining me, precious soul of mine
I finally realized so I love me
Not so perfect but so beautiful
I’m the one I should love

[Bridge]
I may be a bit blunt, I may lack some things
I may not have that shy glow around me
But this is me
My arms, my legs, my heart, my soul

[Chorus]
I wanna love in this world
Shining me, precious soul of mine
I finally realized so I love me
Not so perfect but so beautiful
I’m the one I should love

[Outro]
I’m the one I should love
I’m the one I should love

BTS | Epiphany (Jin’s Solo) | Translation by [Genius]

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BTS | Answer: Love Myself

Again, the Love Yourself albums were something pretty big to me. I also thought it was such an interesting concept that showed the struggles and journey of realizing what love is, what loving yourself means, and that true love starts with loving yourself. Again, it’s such a simple and obvious thing that we often overlook. This song was the conclusion to the Love Yourself albums. It’s definitely one of the songs that I love more so because of the lyrics make me feel. We are often so strict and hard on ourselves. To love ourselves is harder than loving someone else. I learned to love myself, my friends have shown me that there are things I should love. Everything…my past, present, and future selves… they come together to make me who I am, and it’s all a part of a journey to being the best version of who I am. So for me, I’ll continue trying to lay my insecurities to rest, learning from my past and present, and I’ll continue striving on this path of learning to love myself.

[Verse 1: Jimin, Jungkook]
I’m opening my eyes in the darkness
When my heartbeat sounds unfamiliar
I’m looking at you in the mirror
The fear-ridden eyes, asking the question

[Verse 2: Suga]
Loving myself might be harder
Than loving someone else
Let’s admit it
The standards you made are more strict for yourself
The thick tree rings in your life
It’s part of you, it’s you
Now let’s forgive ourselves
Our lives are long, trust yourself when in a maze
When winter passes, spring always comes

[Pre-Chorus: Jungkook, Jimin]
From the eyes of the cold night
I try to hide myself
As I keep tossing and turning ey
Maybe I fell in order to take the place of those countless stars
The target of thousands of bright arrows is me alone

[Chorus: Jin, Jungkook]
You’ve shown me I have reasons
I should love myself (oh)
I’ll answer with my breath, my path

[Post-Chorus: V, Jungkook]
The me of yesterday, the me of today, the me of tomorrow
(I’m learning how to love myself)
With no exceptions, it’s all me

[Verse 3: RM]
Maybe there’s no answer
Maybe this isn’t the answer either
It’s just that loving myself
Doesn’t require anyone else’s permission
I’m looking for myself again
But I don’t wanna die anymore
Me, who used to be sad
Me, who used to be hurt
It’ll make me more beautiful

[Verse 4: J-hope]
Yes, I have that beauty
Knowing that is going
On the path to loving myself
It’s what I need the most
I’m walking for myself
It’s an action needed for me
My attitude towards myself
That’s the happiness I need for me
I’ll show you what I got
I’m not afraid because it’s me
Love myself

[Pre-Chorus: Jin, Jimin, Jungkook]
From the very beginning
To the very end
There’s only one answer ey
Why do you keep trying to hide under your mask? (hey)
Even all the scars from your mistakes make up your constellation (ey)

[Chorus: V, Jungkook]
You’ve shown me I have reasons
I should love myself (oh)
I’ll answer with my breath, my path

[Bridge: Jungkook, Jimin, V]
Inside of me
There’s still
That awkward part of me but (woah)

[Chorus: Jin, Jimin, Jungkook, V]
You’ve shown me I have reasons
I should love myself
(I’m learning how to love myself oh)
I’ll answer with my breath, my path

[Outro: V, Jimin, Jungkook]
The me of yesterday, the me of today, the me of tomorrow (woah)
(I’m learning how to love myself)
With no exceptions, it’s all me

BTS | Answer: Love Myself | Translation by [Genius]

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IU | Celebrity

Again, sometimes we feel like we’re strange. We can feel like an outsider that doesn’t fit in. We tend to view ourselves in a negative manner, and feel like there’s nothing noteworthy about us. However, we don’t realize that how we see ourselves is so different from what others see in us. Those around you see your worth, and the things that make you unique. We often also don’t realize how we may inspire or affect those around us. What you see as someone unnoteworthy, may actually be someone that inspires others or may be a role model. Don’t forget that you’re still in the process of blooming~

[Verse 1]
The world’s edge
Sharply angled, a troubled outsider (Uh, huh)
The walk, the style
Through the earphones the music of my playlist is all minor

[Pre-Chorus]
You have no idea above your lowered head
What the bright lights are (Shining towards)
It’s fine to take your time but I hope you notice, at last
The one and only
You’re my celebrity

[Chorus]
Don’t forget among the cloudy dark
You’re a star painted with a left hand
Can’t you see how beautiful
A true uniqueness can be?
You’re my celebrity

[Post-Chorus]
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, you are, are)
Celebrity
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, are)
You’re my celebrity

[Verse 2]
Your weary face looks like
Someone powered you off, the heartbeat went too quiet (Uh, huh)
The glow you have
The imagination, identity, are you on a diet, huh

[Pre-Chorus]
You have no idea, still not fully bloomed
Written for you (A bygone love poem)
It’s fine to wander around but I wish you could smile, at last
The one and only
You’re my celebrity

[Chorus]
Don’t forget among the cloudy dark
You’re a star painted with a left hand
Can’t you see how beautiful
A true uniqueness can be?
You’re my celebrity

[Bridge]
An autograph written in steps
A drawing sketched in clumsy steps
The path to meet you solely
The path along the dotted line
Don’t forget during the long winter

[Chorus]
A flower can bloom
Between the frozen cracks
Can’t you see how beautiful
Tomorrow’s spring is to be?
You’re my celebrity

[Post-Chorus]
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, you are, are)
Celebrity
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, are)
(I know you are, are)
You’re my celebrity

IU | Celebrity | Translation by [Genius]

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YAYYOUNG | Do You Feel Like You Have No One to Turn To?

This is one of my comfort songs for you all today. I feel like we tend to feel overwhelmed and unable to to open up to others. Yet, there’s a frustration when you’re trying your best to seem fine. This song is to let you know that you’re not alone or unseen. You’re brave and doing the best that you can. So remember in those times you feel like you’ve no one to turn to, it’s okay to cry.

[Verse 1]
There are times when you feel you can never be okay
You can just be still for a while
You don’t have to try
When the moonlight is the only right way to feel that you’re okay
You just close your eyes, let the stars fall down
They will never dry

[Chorus]
Oh how brave
Oh how brave you are
How you’re not afraid to let your scars try to fool who you are
Oh how brave
Oh how brave you are
You just close your eyes
Let the stars fall down
They will never dry

[Verse 2]
There are times when you feel
You can never go back home
You can just be here for while
When the moonlight is the only right way to feel that you’re okay
You just close your eyes
Let your stars fall down

[Chorus]
Oh how brave
Oh how brave you are
How you’re not afraid to let your scars try to fool who you are
Oh how brave
Oh how brave you are
You just close your eyes let the stars fall down
They will never dry

YAYYOUNG | Do You Feel Like You Have No One to Turn To?

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IU | Love Poem

I think it’s really tough to comfort someone who’s in so much pain. You see them, and you see their pain. You honestly wish you could take their pain from them. Yet, you don’t know what to do. Because some people want space, and some people don’t want to show their moments of weakness. And again, sometimes it’s just such a difficult situation that you don’t even know what to say. But what you do know and want them to know, is that you’re always there for them. You want to comfort them, and you’re always ready to comfort them when they’re ready.

[Verse 1: IU]
I think there is someone
Praying for someone
I can hear the love poem
They wrote holding their breath
I wish it flies to you
And arrives to your place before it’s too late..

[Chorus: IU]
I’ll be there, behind you who walks alone
Singing till the end, this song will be endless
Listen carefully just for a second
I will sing for you who walks long nights than most

[Verse 2: IU]
Once again, In your world
A star is falling
The teardrop that you held back
Is flowing here
At a loss of words, my mind calms
I can hear your voice like a memory

[Chorus: IU]
I’ll be there, behind you who walks alone
Singing till the end, this song will be endless
Take a big breath
For you who forgot how to cry aloud… I’ll Sing

[Bridge: 하동균 & IU]
(For you to walk again)
I will sing
(For you to love again)…

[Chorus: IU]
Here I am, look at me, (I will never…)
Singing till the end, (stop this song)
On the day when your long night ends
I will be there
Where you raise your head and look…

IU | Love Poem | Translation by [Genius]

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ReN | We’ll be fine

I wanted to share ReN’s “We’ll be fine” to remind us that we’re not alone, even if we’re apart from those who care about us. It’s hard now, but remember we’re in this together. Honestly, this song makes me think of my closest friends. I’ve talked about it before, but I’m pretty far apart from my friends and family (literally states and countries apart). I don’t get to see them much. Literally haven’t seen my best friends in 2 years, and practically didn’t see my sister in almost a year and 4 months. But I know they’re always there for me, and I’m always there for them. They, including the BAYOG Bros, have always been such wonderful and supportive friends… and I’m eternally grateful to them.

In the endless darkness
We kept wandering
In the whirlpool of anxiety
We still kept searching for tomorrow

With the mention of “It’s Alright”
I felt like I have regained the will to live 

On nights when I can’t see you
I’ll sing a song under the stars

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright
Because we are connected

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine　
When dawn arrived
I’ll pick you up at your place

I was pondering in my small apartment
What can I do right now?
In the endless emptiness
I kept screaming your name

With the mention of “It’s Alright”
It felt like everything will go as planned
Alone, under the night sky
I’ll sing to the crescent moon up in the sky

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright
Tomorrow will come

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine　
When dawn arrived
I’ll pick you up at your place

With the mention of “It’s Alright”
A light was shone on our future
I just made a song of hope
I will sing to the skies as I think of you

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright
Tomorrow will come
You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
When dawn arrived
I’ll pick you up at your place

ReN | We’ll Be Fine | Translation by [desireé law]

Stuck between a void and a darker place
We are just looking, trying to find our way
Stuck inside a world where there’s nothing but pain
Still we’re searching for a better day

大丈夫
It’s gonna be okay
Those simple words mean more than you know

I know it feels like we’re worlds apart
I’ll sing this song for you way up in the stars

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright

We are all connected even though we’re apart

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
When еverything is over

You’ll be missing mе
I’m missing you

We’re all in this together
We’re all in this together

Staring up a wall trying to figure it out
’cause there is something more that I can’t do right now
No one ever know what tomorrow will bring
I’m calling your name over and over it seems

大丈夫
It’s gonna be okay
Those simple words mean more than you know

All by myself under this night sky
I’ll sing this song under the pale moonlight

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright

We are all connected even though we’re apart

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
When everything is over

You’ll be missing me
I’m missing you

We’re all in this together
We’re all in this together
Don’t you worry
It’ll be okay
Those simple words came to brighten my day

I sing this new song ’cause our hope is not gone
Up in these bright stars is where we belong

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright

We are all connected even though we’re apart

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
When everything is over

You’ll be missing me
I’m missing you

We’re all in this together
We’re all in this together

You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright
You’ll be fine
I’ll be fine
Everything is alright

ReN | We’ll Be Fine (English Version)

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Anyway, that’s all for today friends. That’s the end of our MHAM Playlist posts (for now)~ I don’t know how many of y’all have been following this series of posts, but I hope they were able to bring you some comfort and encouragement in some way. Sometimes life hits you hard. You can feel overwhelmed, worn out, and crushed. It can be painful and lonely. It’s especially difficult when you’re struggling, but don’t know how to express your feelings. At times, you feel all alone, unable to open up to or rely on others. You can end up in a cycle and ruminate alot of things from how others view you, what’s perceived as failure and worthlessness. It can eat away at you and your self-esteem and how you view yourself can be greatly affected. With these posts and songs, I just wanted to remind you that you’re not alone. We’re only human. It’s normal to feel sadness, loneliness, frustration, anger, and regrets. I just wanted to remind you that it’s okay to feel those emotions. It’s okay to cry, and it’s okay to feel weak. I also wanted to remind you that you’re not alone. There are people who understand, and there are people who do love and care about you. Although, they may not be sure of how to help you. But do know, there are people out there who are ready to be there for you when you’re ready to let them do so. I also wanted to say not to be too hard on yourself. We’re humans. We’re not perfect. However, don’t feel that you’re worthless or unloved. Sometimes, we don’t realize how we affect others and those around us. But most importantly, I hope that you can learn to be forgiving towards yourself, and to love yourself. People around you are important, but the one who’s most important to you is yourself. The one who will always be there for you is yourself. It’s not easy to love yourself, but let’s take it step by step. Let’s gradually learn to love ourselves. It’s difficult, but I know we can do it. Lastly, I just want to say that I appreciate you all. To make it through another difficult situation or day, to continue breathing, to continue living despite your struggles… you did a great job. I truly wish you the best and nothing but happiness. It’s a difficult and uncertain road ahead, but I hope we’re all able to find our happiness. Take care and stay safe luvs~

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