Music Monday|Epik High — Fan [Spoop Fest]
Happy Monday, BAYOG Fam! I hope you guys have a wonderful start to your week. As you know, it’s Monday. You also know I’ve been trying to keep to the Spoop Fest theme. Honestly, it was harder than I thought to find legit more spoopy and creepy songs and MVs. Everything is more like just cute Halloween visuals, or just cute with Halloween costumes. However, I was reminded of one of my favorite tracks. It’s an oldie, but it’s a timeless classic. Today I’m recommending Epik High’s “Fan”. If you didn’t know, Epik High is one of my favorite artists EVER. I absolutely love them, and I’m hella grateful to them and their music. They’re music is fun, but also beautiful and thought provoking. It’s really clever and some big brain stuff at times. However, I also just love how genuine it is.
Their music is hella relatable and you can tell it comes from the heart and personal experience. I love their music because it’s as if the thoughts and emotions I feel but couldn’t describe have been given form. It conveys my situations, my thoughts, and emotions so very well. It’s just super comforting and gotten me through alot of hard times and when I was struggling with myself. Yeah, I love Epik High. I’ve been a High Skool (Epik High’s fandom) since when Fly came out? Anyway, they’re one of the few artists I wanted to definitely see live and meet before I die. BAYOG and I did it in March 2019~ I cried. LOL We splurged to get the VIP meet and greet package. It was worth it.
Anyway, Epik High is made of 3 members: Tablo, Mithra Jin, and DJ Tukutz. Tablo and Mithra are the rappers, and Tukutz is the DJ. Tablo is also the front man of the group. The man had a great podcast [The Tablo Podcast]. He’s also a literal genius, grew up in all sorts of places like Canada, and graduated from Stanford. They formed in 2001 (over a bowl of pho apparently). They debuted in 2003 with their first album, Map of the Human Soul. They hit mainstream success with their track “Fly” and their Swan Songs album. They’ve also worked with several different artists, including fellow K-Hip Hop heavy names like Dynamic Duo, Tiger JK, Yankie and Verbal Jint. They’ve also worked with Younha, BTS’ Suga, IU, Crush, Taeyang (BigBang), Mino (Winner), Lee Hi, Lee Suhyun (AKMU), OHHYUK (Hyuk Oh), Beenzino, Clazziquai, Kim Jong Wan (Nell), Lee Sora, and more. Anyway, they’re a great group of musicians. They’re also the first Korean act to perform at Coachella too~ They make such deep, serious, and though provoking music. But they’re basically goofballs through and through. Super nice, chill, and down to earth guys.
Track: Fan
Album: Remapping the Human Soul
Year: 2007
Genre: K-Hip Hop, Hip-Hop, Rap, K-Pop, Rock
Language: Korean
“Fan” can be found on Epik High’s 4th studio album, Remapping the Human Soul. It was released in 2007. The title is like a reference and follow up to Epik High’s first album, Map of the Human Soul [YouTube][Spotify]. Which is also probably a reference to Carl Jung’s Map of the Soul. BTS also did a similar reference with their albums [Map of the Soul: Persona] and [Map of the Soul: 7]. Remapping the Human Soul is one of my favorite Epik High albums. It’s also probably the first Epik High album I bought. As much as I love music, I only buy physical albums if I really like it that I legit want to add it to a physical collection. Honestly, I’d love to talk about the whole album, but that’s for another day. I’d like to just focus on “Fan” today. “Fan” is actually preceded by “Love : Crime (Fan Prelude)”. “Fan” is honestly one of my favorite tracks on this album, as well as one of my all time favorite Epik High tracks. It not only sounds amazing, but it’s just an interesting track. It basically looks into the obsession that crazy fans and sasaengs have with their idols. The lyrics are from the perspective of an fan who is completely consumed with their obsession. In a way, you can think of it as being similar to Eminem’s [Stan]. There’s also a remix of “Fan” that appears on Remixing the Human Soul. It’s a special remix collaboration album of Epik High x Planet Shiver. Basically Planet Shiver did a bunch of remixes of some well known Epik High tracks. The remix was titled “Fanatic”. Personally, I liked the original “Fan” over the “Fanatic” remix track.
You can find “Fan” and the Remapping of the Human Soul album on Spotify, here:
You can find “Fanatic” and the Epik High x Planet Shiver Remixing the Human Soul album on Spotify, here:
FAN : Fanatic
Again, the track itself explores a fan’s obsession. Fan obsessions can be really creepy. Especially when it comes to sasaeng “fans”. For those of you who are unfamiliar to the term, they’re basically stalker fans. They’ve basically lost touch with reality. They often cannot tell the difference between reality and what’s in their head. Not only that, they will cross that boundary line. Some I’m a fangirl myself, but I know not it’s important to be respectful, be realistic, and never cross the line. Unfortunately, some fans get hella creepy. They’ll stalk the targets of the obsession to the point that it’s dangerous for themselves and their idols. Some legitimately believe that they have a special relationship with their idol, and that the idol owes them. They legitimately believe that they own the idol. They pour in excessive love and obsession, but can also be ready to hurt the targets of their obsession as well. Some of them do really weird and creepy things. I mean beyond following their idols. Some will wait out locations their idols have been to. They’ll harass friends and family. There have been incidents of sasaengs disturbing random people who just happen to live or be in the area. There were incidents of them breaking in homes to steal things or take pictures of idols as they were sleeping. Some really disturbing and creepy shit is when there were “fans” who were cutting themselves and writing letters with their blood. Some have even sent their period blood or pubic hair to their idols. Some sasaengs have even attempted to hurt idols. Yunho of TVXQ was once poisoned by a sasaeng and had to be rushed to the hospital. Often times, sasaeng “fans” push that boundary, even if its hurtful and dangerous, because they want to gain attention from the object of their obsession. Yeah, it’s disturbing, dangerous, and again… creepy.
FAN Music Video & Lyrics
The lyrics definitely reflect that crazy fan obsession. It’s told by the perspective of the obsessed fan. They state how they’re at a distance, and their target of session doesn’t know them, but they know must know that the fan loves them. Every thought is consumed by thoughts of their obsession. I think it does a great job of reflecting how crazy fan obsession is. The music video also portrays obsession very well too. In the music video, a girl kidnaps the target of her obsession. She locks him up, and monitors him through a screen. She’s then shown to be upset and start to lose it when the guy isn’t happy about being kidnapped and locked up. The guy is basically tormented to the point that he tries to set himself on fire. In the end the crazy fan seems to have killed him. So yeah, very fitting with the theme.
Lyric Translations:
Hook:
Epik High| Fan | Remapping the Human Soul| Trans. Credit: [epikhightrans@tumblr]
(Even if I can’t have you) Even if it’s only in my mind
(Even if I can’t touch you) Even if it’s only a vain dream
(Even if I can’t say it) Even if I’m hiding from a distance
(You know I do) That I love you
Even if you don’t know who I am
Tablo:
Oh baby don’t you know? You don’t even know my name
Today, I’m anxiously staring at you again all night long
Oh so beautiful, I’m holding a photo of you in my hands
My mad whispers of love are buried under the applause of the world
You wouldn’t even be listening, I would never be the one for you
That’s right, even in the next life, you’d live without even knowing who I am
I want to have you so much, I can’t look back anymore
Tonight, wanting to kiss you, I would grab my pillow tightly again
Mithra Jin:
“Today’s the first time we’ve met each other, right?”
Those questions and answers are always only for you
Today, I would start a conversation with you from the back
Though it’s always the same thing, I would shyly greet you
Even if all the ears of the world are covered
Please be the one to listen to my words
Please shake me up when I become hardened at the sight of you walking further away
Far, far away, you become a little dot in my eyes
Where would I be able to see you? (Tell me)
Hook:
(Even if I can’t have you) Even if it’s only in my mind
(Even if I can’t touch you) Even if it’s only a vain dream
(Even if I can’t say it) Even if I’m hiding from a distance
(You know I do) That I love you
Even if you don’t know who I am
Mithra Jin:
Why aren’t you smiling today?
I hope it’s not something serious
I can’t bear to see your face so full of worries
I would rather be the one to go through the pain than you
It’s so sad that I can’t do that
If you gladly greet me and ask me how I am, only for today, I can answer it
So please give me a hug
You, whom I cannot reach, touch, or embrace
Tonight, I’m going to see you again in my dreams
Tablo:
Even in my dreams, even if everyone tries to stop me and laughs at my love
Even if everyone says I’m crazy and wipes the whole world away from me
You’re mine, so why are you taken away by those worthless stares?
No, I can’t do that, I’ll make you look only at me
I’ll give you everything, I’ll bring you the whole world when we kiss
I’ll lock you up in my heart that’s been extinguished, so you can never leave me
You are my star, I’m your number 1 fan
Baby please take my hand
Hook:
(Even if I can’t have you) Even if it’s only in my mind
(Even if I can’t touch you) Even if it’s only a vain dream
(Even if I can’t say it) Even if I’m hiding from a distance
(You know I do) That I love you
Even if you don’t know who I am
Tablo/Mithra Jin:
Boys and girls who are madly in love, say oh, oh, oh
Boys and girls who are foolishly in love, say oh, oh, oh
Boys and girls who are vainly in love, say oh, oh, oh
Boys and girls who are in love like me, say oh, oh, oh
Even if you don’t know who I am
As a bonus, I wanted to throw in Epik High’s performance of Fan at the 2007 Golden Disk Awards. They performed with Honey Lee (aka Hanee Lee), who was Miss Korea 2006. She represented Korea in the 2007 Miss Universe pageant and placed 3rd. She’s since been active as an actress in several dramas and movies. She performed Fan on the gayageum, a traditional Korean zither, for this special performance. If you didn’t know, I absolutely love traditional instrumentals. Zithers like the gayageum and guzheng are some of my favorites. This performance was like a live rock version mixed with the traditional aspect of the gayageum. It was pretty interesting~
Anyway, that’s it for this post! What did you think? Were you guys familiar with Epik High, this album, and this song? What’s your favorite Epik High song? What are your thoughts on fans, fan obsessions, and sasaengs? Let me know in the comments, my socials, or hit me up on Discord~ Take care, stay safe, and have a wonderful start to your week friends~
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